And the way in which one assumes that the ways in which they perceive themselves, is the same way in which others perceive them. I spend so much of my academic time talking about context and subjectivity, and yet when it comes to this real-life concept, I am at a loss. I totally forget that every individual has a different experience of their identity, irrespective of those they are surrounded by. This is the root of rejection - this is the root of failure, this is the root of most self-absorbed thought.
Moreover, it's so not constructive.
In the past couple of days, I have fucked with self-perception. Or rather, self-perception has fucked with me. I have had two individuals in my life challenge my own understanding of myself. The first was an old (male) friend, who shared that he always felt that I gave off a personality that suggested confidence, independence, and a sort of indifference to being single, in this modern society. Anyone who takes the time to get to know me, and have in-depth conversations with me, will know that these are the very subjects I am anxious, and obsessive about. So this perception that was presented to me - it blew my fucking mind!
I then told this story to another individual whom I have only known for the past two months, let's say. This individual then asked permission to be frank, which I always wholeheartedly welcome, and she (I should note, that she is much older than I, a pregnant woman, at that) told me, that she felt the exact same way. She told me I challenged her, that I spoke analytically and thoughtfully, and that she would have to guess I was much older than I actually am.
And challenging self-perception can work both ways. Fortunately for me, it arose in a positive light - but perhaps those who feel entitled, and confidence, are perceived as the complete opposite. I mean, that is completely possible as well.
The point is man is not what man understands himself to be.
Moreover, it's so not constructive.
In the past couple of days, I have fucked with self-perception. Or rather, self-perception has fucked with me. I have had two individuals in my life challenge my own understanding of myself. The first was an old (male) friend, who shared that he always felt that I gave off a personality that suggested confidence, independence, and a sort of indifference to being single, in this modern society. Anyone who takes the time to get to know me, and have in-depth conversations with me, will know that these are the very subjects I am anxious, and obsessive about. So this perception that was presented to me - it blew my fucking mind!
I then told this story to another individual whom I have only known for the past two months, let's say. This individual then asked permission to be frank, which I always wholeheartedly welcome, and she (I should note, that she is much older than I, a pregnant woman, at that) told me, that she felt the exact same way. She told me I challenged her, that I spoke analytically and thoughtfully, and that she would have to guess I was much older than I actually am.
And challenging self-perception can work both ways. Fortunately for me, it arose in a positive light - but perhaps those who feel entitled, and confidence, are perceived as the complete opposite. I mean, that is completely possible as well.
The point is man is not what man understands himself to be.
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